The Golden Globes...no, not Virginia Madsen's!

I must tell you that I am not a big fan of awards shows. I can’t remember when the last time was that I watched one on television or even had an interest in who might win an award. I do recall from years ago waiting with great anticipation for the Oscars. Back in the days when Johnny Carson hosted the Academy Awards we tuned in to see the “show”, the pageantry, the Carson jokes, the Hollywood glitter. Even during the Billy Crystal host era, it was entertaining to watch.

The worst evolution of a well-known awards extravanganza? The Grammys! I haven’t watched this (now) music industry auto-erotic freak show since Loggins & Messina stopped getting nominated. Since Elton John may have been straight. Since there were still four Beatles walking the earth. Since the songs still had chords and were played on real instruments.

Now, the Grammys is a Star Wars Mos Eisley cantina bar display of unrecognizable music, untalented “artists”, and unhumble recipients who should (and may) be wearing GPS ankle bracelets. But the Grammys are for another blog. And don’t even get me started about the MTV Awards. What a bizarre statement that one makes concerning where the music industry is now!

We actually planned to sit down and watch the Golden Globe Awards last night...and we did! I had hoped to watch the show live at 5:00 PST through an east coast NBC feed, but...I ain’t got a satellite dish. We were stuck with trying to stay awake until 8:00 for the cable west coast tape delay version. I drank some coffee when the program started. That may be why I layed awake until 2:00 am.

The show itself is quite scaled-down and mundane compared to some of the other more glitzy awards fiascos. It is broadcast from the Beverly Hilton Hotel. The small, “star-studded, noteworthy guest list does not allow for 5000 of P-Diddy’s closest friends to have a seat. It is a relatively intimate affair...the principals sitting at dining tables and actually having dinner and drinks...limited to the people directly involved with the nominated shows. I don’t remember seeing any “live” perfomances by Brittany Spears, Kid Rock, or 50 Cent. There were no Busby Berkeley song and dance numbers. The Blue Angles didn’t do a flyby inside the building. The Golden Globes is simply an awards “banquet” if you will, put on by the Hollywood Foreign Press.

The Golden Globes is considered a possible look into the future. That future being the Oscars. But not always. The categories are different. The Globes lump together cable movies, theatrical releases, and television...but include separate categories for T.V. shows, ie, comedies, dramas, mini-series, etc.

Most of us commoners would agree that some of the nominated actors and shows are less-than-recognizable. Anyone see Notes on a Scandal or Sherrybaby? Anyone heard of those flicks? But, many of the iconic players were there, sitting near the front...Jack Nicholson, Warren Beatty, Martin Scorsese. The latter winning Best Director for The Departed, (having won in 2002 for The Gangs of New York)...nominated many times, but never recognized by the Academy Awards. Many say this may indeed be a prelude to the Oscars choice.

Some Golden Globe highlights of note (in my humble opinion):

*Martin Scorsese winning Best Director for The Departed.
*Forrest Whittaker (that long time, quirky, brooding, supporting actor from such gems as Good Morning Vietnam, Species, Platoon, The Crying Game) finally winning a Best Actor nod for The Last King of Scotland (as Idi Amin).
*Sacha Baron Cohen winning Best Actor (comedy) for Borat. His acceptance speech was a riot and gets my vote for the Best Of in this viewing category.
*America Ferrera winning Best Actress (TV comedy or musical). Ugly Betty won for best show in that category.

Some Golden Globes lowlights:

*Warren Beatty’s acceptance speech for the C.B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award. Who knew that he had such a stuttering problem?
*Grey’s Anatomy winning for Best TV Drama. Like I said in a previous blog, “I just don’t get it!”
*The usual collection of overunning, babbling acceptance speeches. The worst coming from the least-recognizable people. At least if Virginia Madsen had won (and been nominated of course), we would have been treated to looking at her "golden globes" for a few minutes.
*The incessant network commercial load and NBC self-promos.
*Seeing how many of the “old dogs” of Hollywood, ie, Warren, Jack, and Clint, have become so follicularly challenged of late. Watching scenes from Shampoo during Beatty’s tribute (he had more hair than Eric Carmen back then) made his hair now look a little like, well...my hairline.

By the way, that last lowlight can also be classified as a highlight for me personally.

All in all, The Golden Globes were not all that painful to watch. That’s the best I can do, describe it with a double negative. It wasn’t what you would call entertaining either. But at least we weren’t subjected to any Hip Hop...or someone named Paris...or The Flying Karamozov Brothers...or an emcee with bad writers. It was just an awards banquet. And isn’t that what it should be?